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Spoof news events on this day in history
Showing page 2 (of 10 pages)
(2009) Perez Hilton Assaulted In Toronto - City Goes On Strike
Toronto, Canada - Perez Hilton, famed celebrity gossip columnist in Canada for a music industry awards show, was assaulted by part of his plated dinner. As a result, city employees, in support of the gay icon, have all gone on strike.
Said Perez...
(2008) Ron Paul Chosen to Moderate MSNBC'S "Meet the Press"
Today, NBC executives chose former Republican Presidential candidate Ron Paul to be the new moderator of "Meet the Press."...
(2007) Supreme Court Defines Porn
After being faced with numerous cases involving pornography, the U.S. Supreme Court has set the legal definition of porn as "anything written or published that causes an average or reasonable penis to engorge with blood".
(2005) Official News - Fox News Makes the News
BREAKING NEWS - NEWS BREAKING - Due to the lack of news in the world and the drab boring snippets that are being aired by the planets media channels Fox News have taken matters into their own hands and are trying to improve the quality of reports.
(2007) Bishop Claims "UFO's sent by Satan" are after him
Most recently, a UFO that was described as being a "mile wide" was spotted over the skies of the Channel Islands by local residents, however this was not the first such sighting. Hardly a month ago "mysterious lights" were seen ov...
(2007) Baby Corr In Cabbage-Apparel Related Incident
Last night, while performing her first live gig since the break up of her highly successful family Irish pop/rock group, The Corrs, Andrea Corr was rushed to hospital in Watford after suffering a Cabbage-Apparel related incident. No spokesperson was...
(2009) Man Utd sign Barry Chuckle.
Manchester United have dipped into the transfer market and made what is arguably the signing of the century. Barry "Tash" Chuckle has always been know as a children's comedian but Sir Alex Ferguson spotted his talent whilst watching German Pornograph...
(2009) North Korean Missle Ship Refuses to Leave Hawaii
Well, it's happened again. Yet another "intimidating" North Korean missile carrying ship has accidentally ventured off course in the Pacific claiming to be lost. We were able to track them down in Hawaii, and observed as the men enjoyed a relaxing lu...
(2007) Dick Cheney Above the Law
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Washington - "For four years, Vice President Dick Cheney has resisted routine oversight of his office's handling of classified information and when the National Archives unit that monitors classification in the executi...
(2009) Tina Turner Leaves Chris Brown's To Drop By Hospital
The queen of rock and roll, some say, Tina Turner took a break from her normal activities after visiting with Chris Brown over the past weekend to drop by the nearby hospital for a checkup.
"It's really nothing", she told reporters through her puf...
(2004) New evidence shows Saddam, Osama link is a love connection
The 9/11 commission has found no evidence of a significant link between Iraq and al Qaeda. But spanning the globe in our round-the-clock mission to bring you only the fakest fake news, the
(2007) Chelsea Buys Africa
Chelsea Football Club has bought Africa in a deal thought to be worth £50m, a statement released to the City revealed today. The deal, expected to generate up to £20m worth of additional revenue each year through the UN 'Balls to Hunger' sch...
(2007) Poisonous Chinese products flooding American market
(Seattle, WA) The shortage of port inspectors has allowed countless dangerous products from China to enter the US marketplace. "We just can't possibly keep up with the sheer number of different items coming in from abroad," said a city...
(2010) EastEnders planning to nuke the Queen Vic
EastEnders scriptwriters have revealed the Queen Victoria pub will be destroyed in a nuclear explosion as part of a major storyline later this year.
The scenes will allow them to move to a completely new set to coincide with a move to high defini...
(2007) George Bush Tells Drug Czar to Ban YouTube "Legal High" Videos
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - The "Internets" - President George W. Bush signed an order for the Drug Czar, John P. Walters, to crack down on hallucinogenic YouTube Videos.
(2012) Turkish Jet Shot Down by UFO Over Syria
A Turkish air force jet went down in Syrian waters on Friday, but Turkey's prime minister said he could not confirm media reports that it had been shot down by a UFO.
Turkish and Syrian vessels were searching for the plane - which the media id...
(2010) Fans Want Jon and Kate Gosselin to Replace Simon Cowell on Idol
American Idol asked the fans who they thought should replace Simon Cowell and they responded loud and clear, "We want Jon and Kate Gosselin to be the next big thing on American Idol."
Most everyone agrees that it has never really been about the co...
(2007) Moore's persuasive 'Sicko'
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Hollywood - Michael Moore's film "Sicko" was reviewed today after its Hollywood Premier. The story, while based on 100% real and true events, is rated PG-13 because no child should have to see the horrors of the...
(2005) Ellen Macarthur -- A Dame Fine Performance
In a modern world apparently devoid of a half decent spiritual exemplar, yachtswoman Ellen Macarthur was today trumpeted as the latest demigod elect as she triumphantly sailed into Falmouth harbour following her successful record-breaking circumcisio...
(2010) Abasement brothel busted in Chinese Paris Hilton
Chongqing - (Reuterus): A police dawn raid has shut down the notorious Purple Pussyfat brothel in Chongqing's Paris Hilton Hotel.
Over 100 clients and sex workers were arrested including the city's award winning transvestite hookers catering to th...
(2007) Brad and Angie Want 140 'skinny' Kids
Wanoroboebi (Isandwanna) Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have come out and "admitted" for the first time that they want 140 kids! "But, we don't want No fat ones." said Brad.
Showing page 2 (of 10 pages)
Tories Apologise To Mental Health Organisations Over Use Of Stigmatising Language
'Our activists should not be described as "mad, swivel-eyed loons",' said a spokesman, 'but rather as people with severe mental health problems who experience ocular complications.'
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