Sport Headlines
Ivanovic is largely horse meat, claims Suarez
Sometimes footballer Luis Suarez has refreshed public concern regarding the quality of imported meat in the UK by claiming that that Branislav Ivanovic is at least 30% horse meat.
The Liverpool striker, who faced criticism this week for giving the...
Henry Kissinger Declared Winner Of Bilderberg Golf Competition!
The disqualification of Britain's Shadow Chancellor, Ed Balls for cheating during Sunday's final day Bilderberg annual golfing competition means original runner-up, 90 year old Henry Kissinger has now been declared the official winner.
'I suspecte...
Fergie Retires Sensation
Manchester United manager Sarah Ferguson is to retire at the end of the season. In her statement Fergie declared: 'The Queen has let it be known that I should no longer indulge in Association Football as Rugby Football is the only game (apart from Po...
Man City fan snubs £62 Arsenal ticket to feed family for a week
A disgruntled Manchester City fan today proudly announced his family will 'eat like royalty for a week' after he decided not to pay the outrageous price of £62 to watch 90 minutes of football at the Emirates Stadium in 'that there London'.
Manches...
Homo Sapiens Continue to Bludgeon Neanderthals
Rafa Benitez 'has a dossier on every single Chelsea fan'
Eden Hazard admits, "I did not kick that boy, I only kicked his balls!"
Beckham announces retirement from modelling all forms of underpants
Rio Ferdinand' New Years' Eve samaritan plea!
A desolate Hotel, near Wigan, UK: New Years Eve, everybody is getting ready for fireworks and champagne. People are getting ready for the BIG party.
Then there is a desperate 'TWITter' message picked up by all good Samaritans, by a £115,000-a-we...
Why India will beat England
The BCCI officials met yesterday to discuss the future course of action after Pakistan thrashed India mercilessly. The meeting held in Mumbai was also attended by former and current good-for-nothing cricketers, Srinivasan's astrologer and exclusive B...
Wayne Rooney confirmed with rabies in Montenegro!
Wayne Rooney has been diagnosed with rabies after foaming at the mouth during a training session before tonights very important game against Montenegro.
A stray dog was warming up when it suddenly took a bit out of Rooney's rear end and thinking n...
Steve McClaren Sacked Over Language Barrier
Former England manager Steve McClaren has left his role as coach of the Dutch club FC Twente the day after holding talks with chairman Joop Munsterman over what the latter called 'language difficulties'.
Munsterman said:
"We can't understand hi...
............Daddy cool?
Fathers Day..that once a year milestone when millions of Dads look back over the years with fond memories and a tear in their eye as they remember what it was once like to have money in their wallets!
Snooker Genius Finds Himself in Tibet
Snooker and Pool legend, Donnie O'Mulligan, is returning to the fierce world of competitive snooker. The world snooker and nine-ball pool champion says that he has completely changed.
In an exclusive interview he told me, "I 'ave decided to stop a...
Gazza goes to rehab on a pint!
Gazza, better known as Paul Gascoigne, super-footballer, super drinker and ex-England hero has sadly hit rock-bottom because of his alcohol problems
The soccer world has not forgetten how great this man was for England and are supporting him in hi...
Millwall Fans Split Into Three Factions
Fans of Millwall FC, in trouble recently for fighting amongst themselves at Wembley Stadium, have announced that they have split, not into two warring factions, but three.
The FA Cup semi-final tie against Wigan Athletic was noteworthy, largely, f...
David Beckham comes out of retirement to play for PSG
Pants model and tattooed lady lookalike David Beckham, 37, has sensationally come out of semi-retirement to play competitive football in the French Super Ligue after five years of playing in the Mickey Mouse Millionaire League in America.
East Lon...
Action group ask for Luis Suarez to be culled
A group of people from West London have petitioned government about the possibility of culling Liverpool Striker Luis Suarez.
The move comes after the Uruguayan bit the Chelsea player Branislav Ivanovic during Sunday's Premier League match. Madge...
Rocket Ronnie Not Recovered From His Extended Rest
Ronnie O'Sullivan, the lovable cockney pocket filler, is back on the professional snooker tour. But his actions during a recent practice session demonstrated that the troubled player's return to health is very much a long shot.
Ronnie re-joined th...
Contestants line up for New season of reality show 'Dicing With Russians'
Channel Dive press team officially announced the launch of the tenth season of 'Dicing With Russians' direct from Stamford Bridge but refused to confirm the contestants until the end of the week.
Rafa Benitez is the defending champion, having seen...
Sir Alex Ferguson New Manchester City Manager
Sir Alex Ferguson, the outgoing manager of Premier League champions Manchester United, is to be unveiled later this week as the new manager of arch-rivals, and last year's champions, Manchester City.
Sir Alex, 81, handed in his resignation letter...
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