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10#6702#Simon Cockle#41419.3445602#1#85455
Park keeper mauled by tiger in new terror attack
First a soldier, then a plane - now al-Queda have utilised Sumatran tigers to spread fear and panic in the UK. Authorities are putting everyone in the country on alert about threats from everything.
10#9766#Jaggedone#41417.8102431#2#713489
Germany knocked off the top by North Korea!
Germany nearly made it to the top of the global pop pops but were narrowly beaten by North Korea to the Nr 1 spot. Merkel is to blame because she can't sing and Kim Jong Un can, can!
10#8731#IainB#41417.4980903#3#56695
Google Glasses require a warning
All wearers of Google glasses will be required to wear a badge in future that reads: "This conversation will be recorded for training purposes."
10#14117#John_L#41417.3247338#4#132956
Cameron relived by Terrorist attack
It means that the news of his capitulation on Corporation Tax after Google threaten to pull their £4.5m donation from the Tories.
10#8731#IainB#41415.5838079#5#252264
Abbreviation Conference
Ths yrs conf on Abbrs & TxtSpk will B held at G-Mex M/c. Attnd's shd arv 30mins b4 drs open 2 Nsure a gd seat.
10#12156#Herrdoktorfox#41415.4199884#6#12224
Happiness
What a Gay day!
10#8731#IainB#41415.3001042#7#1026944
Atos Canonised
Atos, the French company tasked with assessing Britain's disabled people has been canonised, after announcing that 30,000 previously disabled people can now walk. That's a better return than Jesus.
10#6702#Simon Cockle#41415.2430787#8#732311
Mobile phones reunited with 'tele'
As from next year, mobile phones will have to be referred as mobile
telephones in all advertising and documentation due to an EU ruling. This follows the decision to reassign the word
wireless to radios.
10#14117#John_L#41414.6481944#9#103802
Chelsea Flower Show lifts ban on Gnomes
William Hague finally able to attend.
10#6112#Swan Morrison#41413.284294#10#100103
Tories Apologise To Mental Health Organisations Over Use Of Stigmatising Language
'Our activists should not be described as "mad, swivel-eyed loons",' said a spokesman, 'but rather as people with severe mental health problems who experience ocular complications.'
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