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Ed Miliband voted Honorary Chairman of the Nodderist SocietyThe annual convocation of Nodderists unanimously elected Miliband as their Honorary Chairman. Nodderists champion those moments when you can't remember what comes next, so Edster was uncontested.
Scientists prove all pain is in the mindIf your head gets stuck up your arse you'll become a pain in the arse.
Izzat Al Douri has been sightedHe was seen on the Scottish Highlands, playing the bagpipes.
A voice in the wilderness.Oh dear, are they about to get their hooks into the 'Peter Pan' of pop I wonder?
Mein GottGerman supermarket chain Aldi report massive ongoing profits.....multiple gunshots heard at Tesco HQ.
iPhone 6 breaks up into little bits when hit with hammer.Another bad day for Apple when it was discovered that when there new iphone 6 was hit with a hammer it breaks up into little pieces. Apple who were made aware of the flaw declined to comment.
Brother wherefore art thou ?George Clooney ties the knot in Venice......leaves suicide note.
David Cameron considers spare toilet tax.Spare toilet tax is being considered by the government in a move which could see more money being extracted from the poor. Labour are furious with the plans.
Britain's first food bank supermarket opens in Hull.Britain's first food bank supermarket opened yesterday in Hull and owners say they plan to open another 12 by next year.
Jimmy Saville to be questioned by police through a meduim.Police are to question Jimmy Saville over alleged crimes he commited when he was alive through a meduim. Savilles family are said to upset by the idea.
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