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Parents Locked Up for Caring by EstablishmentStory reminds world why we are all well and truly fucked
Government lift smoking ban in pubs after dramatic rise in cockfightsAll smoking bans in pubs will be lifted after a leaked government report spoke of stemming the rise of working class smokers buying cockerels on the black market for sport.
Whee TV's "show sure to be a "hit"Whee TV's new show, "Sex Box," features couples doing the dirty in a cardboard box at various locations around London. ("Box," producers point out, is slang for "vagina," so it's a heterosexual show.)
Shelale-Air belt upCut-price Irish Airline 'Shelale-Air' are to step up their level of service for their plush new Business Class. The privileged Passengers will be provided with seat-belts.
Bringing Your Foreign Spouse to Live with you in the UK?Community Centres throughout Britain are now running a 3-year course to help you fill in the forms.
UK terror threat level raised to 'severe'Theresa May is said to have taken this decision to divert attention from a week of damaging headlines for the Tory Party.
Ice Bucket Challenge ConspiracyThe Catholic Church has denied rumours that the Ice Bucket Challenge is a conspiracy to secretly baptise the entire world.
1970's Paedophile-themed Advent Calendars deemed in Poor Taste for Xmas 2014Rescheduled for Halloween
Restaurant needs weighty staffOppenheimer's Nuclear restaurant is looking for an overweight person as a new member of the serving staff. "We need a heavy waiter," said Robert, the owner.
Chain, Chain, Chains!Operation Yewtree officers investigating discovery of three old ladies found locked in the lavatory in Yeovil circa 1937!
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