Funny story: CIA Torture Study a Torture to Read

CIA Torture Study a Torture to Read

"Judicious Use of Cognitive and Physical Trauma to Elicit Psychic Response"--By Dr. Gunter Chang, Director of Cognitive Studies at the Central Intelligence Agency, August 2003. Abstract: Research in the area of the psychic science lags considerably behind other research fields primarily due to lack of reproducible quantitative data obtained under controlled conditions. In an effort to establ...
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Twenty Signs to tell you that you are Dead

1. You think 'your' thoughts are worse than anybody else's. You have not thought about where 'your' thoughts have come from. 2. You are scared the people you respect and who respect you may find out and abandon you. 3. Killing people is okay, you believe, and your favourite movies are all about heroes and the relentless murder they bring. 4. You think sex is love because that is what they...
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A collection of Michael Owen's best tweets

Since joining Twitter the former football player and now commentator Michael Owen has shared his insights into life. Find below some of the nuggets of interest- It's Friday night! Think I might treat myself to a glass of water - I deserve it Good to see out of some of the football matches played today, several of them had winners. Football on later. Hopefully we'll see plenty of ball kic...
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Funny story: The 5 Best Computer Games of the 80s

The 5 Best Computer Games of the 80s

In the early 1980s, computers were larger than TV sets and had less power than today's mobile phones, but they provided a unique new form of entertainment to a select group of lucky nerds. By the end of the decade, it was a multi-thousand pound industry which was beginning to mushroom into the video game entertainment juggernaut which sucks the life from so many souls daily today. We take a nostal...
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Funny story: Channel 6 tonight

Channel 6 tonight

Here is the TV schedule for Channel 6 this evening. 4.00. Lesbian Racing From Ascot. 6.00. Jurassic Countdown Can the contestants solve the conundrum before a T-Rex devours Rachel Riley? 6.30. Come Dine With ME The four chronic fatigue sufferers try to have dinner together. Who will fall asleep first? 7.00. The Best Videos From the Internet Chris Moyles introduces a series of hilar...
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Ryder Cup Congratulations

Congratulations to the European team for winning the Ryder Cup at Gleneagles, Scotland. Yeah, right! The top players from several European nations played against the United States. Sure. As though the European countries didn't already outnumber the United States, the Scots must have had the golf course hot-wired for their European team. When you see a golf ball headed for the cow past...
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Why the religious far right are targeting transgender people

A few years ago, the religious far right in America targetted gay people. They were classed as an abomination in the eyes of god, but in the last eighteen months, focus has shifted onto the transgender population instead. At first glance there does not seem to be a reason for this. The transgender men and women are trying to eke out lives the best they can in a binary gender weighted world,...
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Funny story: Are You A Serial Killer ? Our 10 Question Diagnostics Will Tell You Instantly

Are You A Serial Killer ? Our 10 Question Diagnostics Will Tell You Instantly

Answer Yes or No 1) Have you ever woken up in bed with a blood covered machete beside you? 2) Are you serving consecutive or concurrent life sentences for murder? 3) Do you hate your mother? 4) Have you ever tortured animals? ( excluding officially approved laboratory trials). 5) Do you think all women are painted harlots and instruments of the devil? 6) Do you frequently hide in bushes...
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Breaking News...

ISIS stop beheading!

Relieving news is reaching us from Iraq, ISIS have vowed not to behead anybody anymore, therefore they will kidnap babies and spike them on their bayonets; lovely bunch!
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Funny story: Isle Of Wight Factoids - 10 Things You Didn't Know

Isle Of Wight Factoids - 10 Things You Didn't Know

1) The Isle of Wight contains less prisoners per head of the population than Alcatraz or San Quentin. 2) Despite over one hundred movies about daring escapes from The Isle of Wight, only one person, Harry Houdiney is known to have successfully escaped and lived to tell the tale in 1955. 3) How big was the average b and b room in 1943? Each single room was 5 feet by 9 feet. Double rooms ha...
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Funny story: Britain's Favourite Christmas Songs

Britain's Favourite Christmas Songs

It's the festive season again, and who could fail to be excited by the never-ending stream of Christmas songs blaring from shops, radios and people's throats. Christmas music is Britain's favourite music genre, and every year millions of us buy copies of our favourite Christmas songs so that we can listen to them all year long. Here we provide a countdown of the 5 best Christmas songs. 5.
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Funny story: New words of 2014

New words of 2014

The latest edition of the Dorking Standard English Dictionary was released to the shops this week. Publishers were celebrating after the number of words increased 3% on last year to reach a record 800,000. It means that the English language has completed its recovery since the great word crash of 2002 when many words were lost. Here are a selection of the new words which have made it into the d...
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Funny story: Small talk - a poem

Small talk - a poem

I'm just no good at small talk Narrow and bijou Microscopic and minute Sorry, what do you do? Dinky winky, little, dwarf Incy wincy, klein Matchbox, kneehigh and compact Can I top up your wine? Teensy weensy, minimal Teeny weeny, wee Itsy bitsy, miniscule Would you like a cup of tea? Baby, mini, miniature Shrunken, titchy, speck Narrow, nipper, iota, mite Get naked? What the h...
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Funny story: A Christmas Message from Bono 2014

A Christmas Message from Bono 2014

Hello Hello, Dis year I have been busy saving the world again. My friend and fellow tax exile Sir Bob let me sing on Band Aid again. So that I could start in my new mission to eradicate Ebola. I think I will have this all cured by Christmas, but I will be promoting my other things as well. I now have a rival, Russell Brand, who thinks he can be the saviour of the world. He can't there is on...
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Funny story: Britain For The Brits!

Britain For The Brits!

We at Back and to the Left news pride ourselves on giving everyone a voice, including those of us who don't deserve one. We try to be as fair as we can be when it comes down to our interviews and subsequent write ups. So when we decided to interview a member of the group Britain First our peers (the other people in the hostel we currently call home) we're shocked. They asked us "why would you give...
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Funny story: Auntie Jean Advises Les Brains From Barf Who Has To Decide On A Career

Auntie Jean Advises Les Brains From Barf Who Has To Decide On A Career

Les Brains Asks: Auntie Jean, I was dropped on my head by the midwife as a baby and consequently cannot make any decisions and have no moral fibre. I can't tell right from wrong , am dishonest and selfish and frequently accidentally wear my jacket inside out. I have an appointment with the Career Adviser at school tomorrow and would like to ask about a career. Which should I choose? Auntie Jea...
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Funny story: Terrorism. Who's Next? Ask the Bookies!

Terrorism. Who's Next? Ask the Bookies!

Following the murder of a soldier in Ottawa by a crazed 'Muslim' convert Michael Zehaf-Bibeau, bookies in the UK are offering odds as to what country will be next. The assailant claimed apparently that he had been "chased by the devil" leading to speculation of how he got the idea and where exactly it came from. And did the devil speak with an hypnotic American or British accent? Whether wired to...
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Jaggedone
Jaggedone
Joined: 08 April 2009
Stories Written: 1,298

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