Funny story: CIA Torture Study a Torture to Read

CIA Torture Study a Torture to Read

"Judicious Use of Cognitive and Physical Trauma to Elicit Psychic Response"--By Dr. Gunter Chang, Director of Cognitive Studies at the Central Intelligence Agency, August 2003. Abstract: Research in the area of the psychic science lags considerably behind other research fields primarily due to lack of reproducible quantitative data obtained under controlled conditions. In an effort to establ...
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This Country's Gone to the Dogs Innit?

We have lost our bloody way as a nation we have. Our country has become infiltrated by joyless snobbish lefties, filthy immigrants, rampant homosexuals who are up for anything and miserable and fat feminists. What happened to the good old days innit? The good old days of Only Fools and Horses, Rolf Harris, Rod Stewart, The National Front, It It Ain't Half Hot Mum, New Faces, Jim'll Fix It, Dav...
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Why the religious far right are targeting transgender people

A few years ago, the religious far right in America targetted gay people. They were classed as an abomination in the eyes of god, but in the last eighteen months, focus has shifted onto the transgender population instead. At first glance there does not seem to be a reason for this. The transgender men and women are trying to eke out lives the best they can in a binary gender weighted world,...
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Funny story: Weasel News Bigots Backtrack on Offensive "Reddit SJW" Accusations

Weasel News Bigots Backtrack on Offensive "Reddit SJW" Accusations

Shona Grammy and Super Bill Frieli from Weasel News broke down in tears yesterday when they realized that the people they had been dismissing for years as "Whiney, crybaby Reddit SJWs" were actually people just like them. Shona Grammy sobbed, "All this time, I thought these people were, you know, like Obamabots or something, who had been planted as fake personas to bring socialism, pro-womanism...
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Funny story: How Britain's Economy Works

How Britain's Economy Works

The year is 2015, and although we're not living on the Moon yet, we do enjoy a futuristic lifestyle here in Britain. In recent years the UK economy has expanded, unemployment has slumped and the suicide rate has literally gone off a cliff. So how do we do it? I decided to investigate, following the typical life of an office worker in modern Britain. I met Rob at 6am. He starts early, but tha...
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The Big Woop's Nefarious Plot to Undermine Capitalism

The national magazine sold exclusively by the homeless, Big Woop, has faced many damning criticisms in its time. Allegations abound of aggressive selling techniques which are harming the Universal Beltway Interest of Our Common Humanity and/or that of the Golden Pigsty (or, if you prefer, of the Houses of Perishing in Warminster). And you have you forgotten already about the millions of peo...
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Theresa May: "We must Engage with the Moderate Homosexual Community"

Apparently, because Theresa May is from the Conservative Party, she has the dispiriting responsibility of reluctantly assimilating individuals in a rather more blunt and crude way than Labour or Lib Dems. So she has sworn to "engage with the moderate homosexual community," in order to ensure that gay people do not cause any more "chaos, subversion and aesthetic terrorism." As a Conservative,...
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Funny story: News headlines from around the globe; shocking!

News headlines from around the globe; shocking!

OK Jaggedone's CIA (Cockroach Infiltration Army) fans all over the planet here's our daily round up of news shocking the planet in short! (This lot makes Russell Howard look like Andy Pandy!) A sick twat in Florida who had sex with a dolphin, yes a dolphin, claims the female dolphin 'wooed' him and he just could not resist! CIA judge, Peregrin Jaws-Greatwhite, has sentenced the pervert to swi...
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Breaking News...

Fog hits British news readers on the Beeb!

It seems that Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson getting the boot from his rather childish programme is more important than the German Wings tragody. Well that's what the Beeb shows on the internet!
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Funny story: Queen Maxima of Holland divulges the truth!

Queen Maxima of Holland divulges the truth!

Dutch HQ of Jaggedone's CIA global army... Exclusive interview with Queen Maxima of Holland! Our Dutch star scumbag scandal reporter, Johann Crutch van Amsterdamned has infiltrated the royal palace in The Hague and forced Queen Maxima to give the following interview; she hates bugs! "Queen Maxima how the fuck did you become queen of Holland" Queen Maxima: "I did 5 things and here th...
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Funny story: Isle Of Wight Factoids - 10 Things You Didn't Know

Isle Of Wight Factoids - 10 Things You Didn't Know

1) The Isle of Wight contains less prisoners per head of the population than Alcatraz or San Quentin. 2) Despite over one hundred movies about daring escapes from The Isle of Wight, only one person, Harry Houdiney is known to have successfully escaped and lived to tell the tale in 1955. 3) How big was the average b and b room in 1943? Each single room was 5 feet by 9 feet. Double rooms ha...
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Funny story: Auntie Jean Advises Les Brains From Barf Who Has To Decide On A Career

Auntie Jean Advises Les Brains From Barf Who Has To Decide On A Career

Les Brains Asks: Auntie Jean, I was dropped on my head by the midwife as a baby and consequently cannot make any decisions and have no moral fibre. I can't tell right from wrong , am dishonest and selfish and frequently accidentally wear my jacket inside out. I have an appointment with the Career Adviser at school tomorrow and would like to ask about a career. Which should I choose? Auntie Jea...
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Funny story: Britain's Favourite Christmas Songs

Britain's Favourite Christmas Songs

It's the festive season again, and who could fail to be excited by the never-ending stream of Christmas songs blaring from shops, radios and people's throats. Christmas music is Britain's favourite music genre, and every year millions of us buy copies of our favourite Christmas songs so that we can listen to them all year long. Here we provide a countdown of the 5 best Christmas songs. 5.
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Funny story: A Christmas Message from Bono 2014

A Christmas Message from Bono 2014

Hello Hello, Dis year I have been busy saving the world again. My friend and fellow tax exile Sir Bob let me sing on Band Aid again. So that I could start in my new mission to eradicate Ebola. I think I will have this all cured by Christmas, but I will be promoting my other things as well. I now have a rival, Russell Brand, who thinks he can be the saviour of the world. He can't there is on...
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Funny story: A rap from David Cameron

A rap from David Cameron

The following is a rap from Prime Minister, Conservitive Party leader and notorious hip-hop fan David Cameron that he wrote for us at the Spoof Musical Express with hope that he will open your eyes and get you interested in politics. Take it away David... Yo It's David C Telling you to vote for me The leader of the Tory party. I want you to let me stay And save the day Samant...
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Funny story: London's Lonely Hearts

London's Lonely Hearts

Grace Power - Tattoo Artist (35) Short haired lady with muscular build whose interests include pumping iron, spitting and football. Is looking for a professional and handsome business-like man. Murray Miller - Retired Factory Assistant (104) 4 ft 4 in height, decrepit, wrinkly and covered in moles and liver spots who enjoys waking up in the morning. Is seeking a woman who can take him to...
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Funny story: Jesus's Lost Parable Found

Jesus's Lost Parable Found

The Synod of Hippo in AD 393 was a gathering of Catholic bishops who established the contents of the Bible. A definitive list of books now currently in use did not come into existence until the Council of Trent (1545-63) was set up to counteract the Reformation by bringing clarity to the Church's teaching. Biblical scholar Dr. Flynn O'Toole from Trinity College Dublin while doing research on t...
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